Mar 12 2008
It’s a boy!
Break out your cigars and earplugs, it’s a boy! (As previously mentioned in my article about Parenting Advice) A friend and colleague of mine just gave birth to a healthy baby boy. Yep, I called it. So as is typical when learning about her exciting news, my girlfriend and I sent a small basket of flowers. With a card. Which got me thinking.
What is the right message to put in a card like that? Should it be a sympathy card (”I’m sorry for your loss… of free time.”)? A birthday card (”Yeay! You’re zero now!”)? Perhaps a get well card (”Hope you recover from your recent medical procedure”)? One of those “just because cards” (”Just because you had a baby, don’t try and drag out your time off.”)? And even though we’re friends, proper office etiquette would prevent me from saying, “Congratulations on losing all that weight!” So, maybe I should just get one of those ‘Blank Inside’ cards (” “). I’m pretty sure they’re made for times like these.
And speaking of her new boy, I sure am glad that’s what she had. Don’t get me wrong, a girl would’ve been nice too. But what if she had had a hermaphroditic baby? Because, you know, they don’t make giant mylar balloons that read: “It’s an it!” And I’m sure she’d love it, and take care of it, and be thrilled no matter what, but still, it raises all sorts of interesting questions. The most important of which is: what color do you dress a hermaphrodite baby in? Some shade of purple?